 |
Stress Management and Mastery: How to Learn from Mistakes
Q. I've been told that I need to learn from my mistakes. But telling me to learn from my mistakes is easier said than done. How exactly does it happen? A. People seem to go through three stages in learning how to learn from their mistakes: Stage One: Get me out of this! No one likes mistakes or the problems and challenges that accompany them. But each mistake, problem and challenge comes with a gift for us. When we are rescued from our mistakes, we miss out on what we are to learn from them. There are certain lessons that each of us is to learn in life. If we don't learn the lesson the first time around, the same mistakes, problems and challenges will come back around. I call this the "taps and 2-by-4's process of life." When we need to learn and/or change something, life begins with a small tap on our shoulder. If we don't pay attention, the taps get more forceful. If we still don't listen, life has a way of taking out a 2-by-4 and whacking us across the head to get our attention. Having been on the receiving end of a few 2-by-4's, I recommend that you pay attention to the taps, because 2-by-4's hurt. Stage Two: Get me through this Instead of looking for a way out, you are looking for a way through. We begin to ask questions like "How can I get through this?" instead of "How can I get out of this?" The focus is on survival instead of escape. The only problem is that while surviving sounds good, it's not very compelling. How excited would you be each morning if you got up thinking, "All right, I get to go survive today"? Sometimes it seems like the very best we can do is survive a situation, but I believe there are better responses we can choose. In the words of Dan Fogelberg: "Lessons learned are like bridges burned, we only need to cross them but once." Stage Three: What can I learn from this? This is when you begin to learn from mistakes. If you believe that all mistakes come with hidden gifts, then this is when you can begin to discover them. Just asking the question frames the situation in a different perspective. Here are some useful questions to ask: What was I trying to accomplish? Did it work? What ongoing themes were revealed that need to be changed? How many other ways are there to accomplish what I want? Is what I want to accomplish the right thing to do? Is it worth doing? What will happen if I keep making this mistake and/or don't learn anything from this problem? Making a mistake is not the biggest mistake we can make; not learning from them is the biggest mistake. Visit SecretsofGreatRelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.
MORE RESOURCES:
|
Lastest Stress Management NewsTom Wilt NewsJust what we need — another national survey rating relative stress levels across the country. Stress – Health – Mental Health – Support Groups – Management ... |
|
Reduce blood sugar levelsHindustan Times... is a disease of the affluent, which precipitates due to a sedentary lifestyle, eating refined foods, excessive drinking and poor stress management. ... |
Google News
|
|
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
Seven Steps to Reducing Stress and Reclaiming Your Life at Work
According to the StressPulse survey by ComPsych Corporation completed at the end of 2003 and is still valid today: Employees in the category of high stress have increased by 15%
More than 29% of employees come to work five or more times a year when they are too stressed or distracted to be effective
63% have high levels of stress with extreme fatigue or feeling out of control
32% have constant but manageable stress levels
43% lose one or more hours per day in productivity due to stressThe Definition of BurnoutAt some point in your career you will experience burnout. No matter how much you enjoy your job there will come a time when you just do not feel like doing it anymore.
Stress Management - Overcoming Adversity
Adversity is an unavoidable part of life. Death of a loved one, breakup of a relationship, malicious action by another, job loss, natural disaster, or any other undesirable event are all circumstances people encounter.
Music Therapy: Can Music Really Soothe The Savage Beast?
It has long been suggested that "music soothes the savage beast." But is this true? And if it is, does this have any implication where humans are concerned? The answer, apparently, is yes.
Dialing M For Mindfulness
Looking for mindfulness? Who ya gonna call?Try dialing M.It's easy to be mindful.
Moving Through Breakdowns with Transformation
Success in recovery, or rather, staying in recovery, is dependent upon a variety of factors. For example, it appears that attending daily NA or AA meetings and staying in communication with ones chosen sponsor will definitely assist an individual in successfully implementing his recovery plan.
Stress Reduction Tips for Parents
The best way to reduce your stress is to really know what it IS, that is making you stressed! So sit down for a minute and think about last year. You can look at a calendar to remind yourself of events, or appointments.
Stress Dangerously Raises Cholesterol Levels
Several studies, including one of medical students around exam time, and another of accountants during tax season, have shown significant increases in cholesterol levels during stressful events - when there was little change in diet.Interesting isn't it!Are you caught up in modern day life? Do you have a mix of crazy work deadlines, household responsibilities and family needs -- perhaps car problems or some bills that need urgent payment? You need to be very careful: Medical researchers have now discovered a link between periods of severe stress and increased cholesterol levels.
Stress Management: Problem Land or Solution Land
In my experience, most of us spend a lot more time living in problem land, griping and complaining, than we do in solution land, working hard and enjoying solving problems.It's almost become a national past time.
Taking Care of Yourself
Living in our world today can be very stressful. While some of the stress that we experience is actually useful for motivating us, a point can be reached where it becomes very harmful, physically, emotionally and even spiritually.
Ease Your Stress ? Change Your Life!
Feeling stressed? Who isn't!! In today's society, feeling "stressed out," overwhelmed and exhausted is the norm. However, moderate day-to-day stress takes its toll on our minds and bodies.
What is Stress?
Stress is an interpretation of an event or circumstance which is understood to be a threat. It can be any force or pressure put on a system (living or nonliving) which may result in a need for the system to adapt or change.
Some Tips for Mental Well Being - Ways to Help Yourself!
Get at least 15 minutes of sunshine daily.Daily Exercise - Exercise releases endorphins that make us feel good and is known to boost people's moods and is good for depression.
Putting Your Life in Perspective
Do you often overreact to situations? Are you a constant worrier? Do you look at the glass as always half empty?One of the greatest stress management tools you can possess is the ability to put everything into perspective. How you perceive your life has a profound effect on how you deal with stress and your level of happiness.
3 Easy Ways to Reduce Stress
Stress, America's #1 health problem, is a leading cause of major illness. In fact, heart disease, high blood pressure, and depression are just some of the harmful effects of stress.
The Top Seven Causes Of Workplace Stress And Fifteen Ways To Get Rid Of Them
Anyone who has ever worked knows that stress is part of the workplace. Stress in itself is not bad, in fact, we can't live without it.
Make a Handbag - Discover Inner Peace and Stress Reduction
Have you ever considered sewing a handbag as an act of meditation or as a way to get in touch with your self and reduce stress? Let's look at the process In order to see the connection to inner peace.To make a handbag, the sewer needs to focus on the immediate - you need to be precise and concentrate on what you are doing at the present moment.
Assess Your Stress Using Haris Stress Inventory
This is a tool to measure the amount of stress you experience in your daily life. 66 statements are included.
Stress Relief in Minutes
For those who are suffering from stress, just about the hardest thing to find is stress relief. Stress can often continue itself on its own energy and, as it mounts up upon itself, it builds itself into an absolute mental frenzy.
Reduce The Stress!
First, let's make a distinction between pressure and stress. We all have sources of pressure in our lives - sometimes a little, sometimes a lot.
Cancel Stress and Be Blessed!
Matthew 11:28
Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.In this verse, Jesus Christ invites those that have struggles and those who are buried with issues and dilemmas.
|
